First date!

This post probably makes more sense if you read the rules first.

I asked this lovely Italian woman out for my first date. I guess I am going to keep using the word ‘date’, even though I am only meeting people and getting to know them. There is no romance involved, just two people enjoying each others company.

As I am waiting for her to arrive, I am getting kind of nervous. I had a pretty stressful weekend and I am hoping I will be able to relax and enjoy a casual dinner with this woman I know very little about. It is a new experience: I do not usually walk to up to people I barely know and ask them out for dinner. I had decided that this project was a good idea, and that this was something I needed. That it would help me grow and that it would accelerate the post-breakup healing process.

While in theory that sounds great, it turns out there is a big difference in telling yourself that you should walk up to awesome women and ask them out for dinner and actually doing it. Having been dumped is not exactly a confidence booster. But that is exactly why I should be doing it.

When she shows up we pick a restaurant and everything just goes well. We pick a place to eat, we have a dinner and we start chatting. We talk about our lives, about the different ways people date in Belgium compared to Italy, and about our shared hobby: dancing salsa. She is smart, funny and interesting to talk to. There is something intensely liberating about opening up to someone new. With no expectations of this going anywhere romantic, we have no reason to hold back. So we talk, and we share. Hours fly by. We move to another restaurant for dessert and decide to go dancing afterward.

While we are walking to the dance place, we talk about the challenge and I realize I forgot to tell her there would be a blog post about it. We talked very openly and she is understandably alarmed when she finds out I intend to keep a blog about these dates. I ensure her that the main focus will be on my experience. I really should be very clear about the blog in the future.

As we dance, it finally starts to sink in. I had fun. We enjoyed each others company, and had a good evening. I guess on some level, I had not actually expected that to happen. The thing is.. I already know life sucks after a breakup, and I know time heals all wounds. Everyone also keeps reminding me of this, just in case I forget.

I came up with this challenge to prove for myself that life as a single person does not have to suck. That I can make it interesting, if I put my mind to it. There are tons of fun and interesting people out there and all I need to do is ask them to hang out with me. I mean, I thought about the whole thing a lot, and talked about it a lot. Now that I am going ahead with it, it is working and does exactly what it is supposed to do. I think that at some level… I did not expect it to actually work. Or at least not as well as it did.

One excellent date down. Twenty nine more to go. I am looking forward to the next one!

Activity details:

Dinner: chicken, cheese and fruit salad at “De Kansel” in Munstraat, around €15. Traditional Belgian cuisine, cozy surroundings and friendly staff.

Dessert: Apple Pie & Ice cream, “Notre Dame” on Grote Markt, around €5. Also traditional Belgian cuisine. This place is huge and is very popular, and the Apple pie was delicious.